One of the abilities I have, is that I can weep till the cows come home, and then when I stop, no traces would have been left behind...

For the first time in my life (as far as I can remember), I lost control of myself. In the past, even during times of distress or fury, I've always had some measure of control. I can, for example, get so angry I shout at my errant students for misbehaviour or throw something, but I have enough self control to not do anything stupid like hurt anyone or embarrass myself.

I'm not sure why, or how it happened. Perhaps I've been under more stress, or been more unhappy than I even knew? I really don't know. I was shocked at myself afterward. I never even knew I had the volcano simmering underneath until it erupted. Right now, I'm just exhausted, drained of motivation and emotion, and confused. It's as if I just found out I had an illness I never knew existed.

It must have been an accumulation of events and emotions/stress. Frankly, nothing major or upsetting happened today really. I've definitely had worse. The word that could summarise the day, as with many other days, is BUSY. It was so bad I had to wait till 2pm before I could find time to grab a bite. In my line of work, that is quite something, considering that we are up way before 7am. I didn't even have time to go to the toilet at all till I got home after 6pm! Can you imagine that??

Today was just a blur of lesson after lesson, rushing everywhere trying to get everything done, getting all stressed up because my report books aren't done and I don't have time to sit down and key everything in because of the oral exams.... and then in the afternoon, after gobbling my lunch down, was 3 hours of oral exams. 4 straight days of that this whole week. On the average, we finish at about 6pm every day, leaving no time for any other work or lesson preparation. Don't even talk about marking. After today's oral exams, I was trying so hard to keep awake during my drive home that I ended up with a headache. Had a dinner appointment so I really didn't have much time to sleep. But I was so desperate and deprived of sleep that even if it was just a few minutes, I would take it gladly. And so I slept, so soundly that I didn't hear my alarm clock go off at all...when I did wake, it was only because my mum called me...and then I went into shock when I realised that I was late for my dinner appointment. I felt really bad after I called my friend to apologise, and my head was spinning from having woken up so quickly. Just quickly threw on my clothes and left the house, feeling really tired and miserable. Just as I was leaving, my mum shouted something about me leaving a drink half-drunk in the refrigerator. And she just went on and on... and before I knew it, something inside me just snapped. I can't even remember what I did exactly. I only remember that I was on the verge of screaming. And I just wanted to stand in the middle of nowhere and just scream and scream and scream... and at that point of time I think, even if there were people around, that wouldn't have stopped me. I was beyond caring what other people would think. And THAT, for someone like me, is really SOMETHING. Somehow or other, I managed to get out of the house, I must have said something quite loudly because I remember my neighbour moving to look out of her house somewhat cautiously. And then, it was all I could do to hold the tears back.

I must have literally ran for the car. And the moment I was safely in the confines of my car, the floodgates opened. I can't remember the last time it was this bad. And it felt like it lasted forever. Just wanted to scream and shout and.....I don't know...it was all a jumble. I don't even know what it was. Frustration? Maybe this feeling that everyone was demanding something from me and I just couldn't give it? Sick and tired of being tired? Of trying to live by my own strength? Tired of feeling that 24 hours a day was not enough? Feeling that I need to give of myself to others, even when sometimes I can't afford it? ARRGH. I don't even know how to articulate what it was that overcame me so suddenly!! Even after I started the car, the flood continued. Loud and heaving. Bawled all the way. Non-stop. Till about 2 or 3 traffic lights away from where I was supposed to pick my friend up. At one of the traffic lights I had to stop at, I wiped up all traces and continued on my way. I don't think she even suspected. Quite an ability I have eh?

I'm so so tired. Of trying to live up to expectations. Of others and mine. Sometimes I just want to sleep and not have to wake up.

One of the worst things a student can tell his/her teacher is that he/she has learnt nothing from him/her. Even if it was said in jest.

It hit me hard when it came. And I didn't even realise how hard until hours later when I woke up from a deep sleep, that phrase suddenly rang in my head again, making me feel bad. I've taught this class for close to two years. That's a couple of hundred days and more. And they've learnt nothing? I feel so useless. It only goes to reinforce my wanting to quit. Now, there's really nothing left to hold me back. Especially not when I have students who spend half a lifetime either sitting out in the detention area or sleeping in class. I really don't have much motivation anymore, honestly. My efforts over the past 2 years have been negated.

Teacher

Counsellor

Nurse

XXXX

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I toyed with the idea of going into counselling because although I couldn't foresee teaching to be a lifelong career for now, I don't seem to dread it as much as I did before. Also, I do find joy in caring for people and in talking to them. Occasionally when, by the grace of God, He allows me to see some fruit and I see some change, I'm feel so happy and it makes the effort all worthwhile. I thought perhaps this was a possible area I could work towards if I could persuade myself to stay in teaching a while more so as to further this area. You know, like take more courses in this area or sth. I really enjoyed the one I attended. But lately, because of the recent spate of events at school, I had an epiphany.

Lately, it just seems that everyone around me is down. Being the rebellious sort I am, I refused to go down with everyone else, although I must admit that I was, to some extent, affected. I found myself trying to pull everyone else up. Perhaps I was using my own strength. But I did find fulfilment in what I was doing. Really. Don't get me wrong ok? I really wanted to be there for every single one of the people I talked to who needed help or needed an ear. I've no grouse against that. I LIKE being that listening ear and being confided in. I liked running around trying to gather people around to do something or other to make others feel better. It gives me a lot of joy to do things for people that way I think. Unlike guys, I don't feel helpless when people cry in front of me. I think it a privilege that anyone would be comfortable enough to do that in my presence, and I feel this strong urge to help and to do something for that person. But then, I'm also very aware that the converse is true. If I am unable to help or do anything to make that person feel better, I'd feel helpless and lousy. Even if, on a rational level, I know that there's no way I can dictate how a person would react. There will be people along the way who might not get better or might not respond to the help rendered. Just like how lousy I feel when I spend so much time and effort trying to prevent my students from 'going bad' but then still, I see them flouting the rules, doing again and again what I said not to do, and constantly sitting outside in the detention area. I really HATE that. It's as if some irrational voice in me is telling me that I'm an ineffective teacher who can't control her kids. It's one thing to feel bad that I can't control my students with punishment, but it's really another thing to say that even with all the love and time and effort I showered on them, it makes ABSOLUTELY NO DIFFERENCE to them. They won't even stay out of trouble for love of their teacher who has so painstakingly counselled them and written them love-notes. Ouch. Boy does it hurt.

Having everyone down and me trying to stay afloat also started to take its toll on me as the days went by. Practically it was inevitable. Afterall, talking to people does take time. And that time had to come from somewhere. Out of work and out of sleep. For a week or more, I've been sleeping at 1 or 2 am on the average, and waking up at 6plus in the morning. And with so many things on my mind, I could hardly expect quality sleep. And on some level, towards to end of this week, I've been having this tiny urge to scream or to rant to somebody. But then I looked ard me and found that unlike old times when more of my good friends were around, I had no one to rant to anymore. Either they're too far away, or they're too caught up in their own stuff and I don't want to pull them down anymore than they already are. In fact, even with the invention of the telephone, communication doesn't get easier because sometimes people don't really pick up their phones. Me included. Sometimes I just....don't...want...to....pick....up. Several times I felt the need to talk or to voice something out. But the people I called just somehow weren't available. Sigh.

Anyway, my point is, I came to the realisation that I probably wasn't the sort that could give and give and give....without getting burdened or tired. I think I'd get bogged down by everything and start feeling depressed. Especially if good friends weren't around for me to air my feelings and thoughts. Also, I'm not sure I can handle not being able to see a change in a charge if I were indeed a counsellor. I might feel useless, ineffective and lousy. Perhaps I need a job that has a more clinical aspect, you know, more science, the cold hard thing. Like Maths or something. Use the formula right and you gotta have the solution and only one solution. Sometimes, I think, people need that. And so do I.

Teacher

Counsellor

Nurse

XXXX

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For longer than the past year, I struck out the first one (at least for the meanwhile) because I've been feeling so tired, so unappreciated, so unmotivated....generally just down when I think about work. When I think about work, its as if I see this formidable mountain. I start thinking about my marking, about grades, about how I actually really don't know HOW to teach english even though it's been what, 4 years? I think about CCA and how I also don't really know how to train the girls, cos I'm just NOT a coach! I was one of those who had to pick balls when I was in the team because my coach didn't think that we'd amount to anything. It doesn't help that there's so much admin to handle, and I'm all alone with no other teacher to help. I'm sick of orientating new teacher after new teacher, and I also don't dare to ask the PE HOD for help because I'm half-afraid he'd turn around and demand why I need another teacher when I'm not even training the sec 1 boys myself. That would just make me feel more useless.

Then I look at my class, and I see how badly they did in their English exams. No matter how many times I tell them how to approach the questions and what NOT to do, they just wouldn't listen. Even when I marked their papers, I just got angrier and angrier, and then I started seeing in my mind's eye, how they don't seem to pay attention when I talk....it makes me feel ineffective. I'm practically not making any difference to them. They'd do just the same in the exams even if I weren't around. Then what's the point of me even going to class? Then I see some of them sitting outside at the detention area and getting caught for this and that, in spite of my disciplining them, in spite of my scoldings and pep talks and long notes I've written to them in the hope that they'd change....when I see that all I've done has come to naught, it makes me feel even more useless.

The other day, I had this conversation with a colleague, and one of her remarks hit me. She said,"Don't you know? It's very lop-sided in this school. Either you are in favour or out of favour." That got me thinking. Which side was I on? I'm quite obviously not in favour I think. Then that makes me out of favour? Does that mean I've been a bad testimony at work? But I just don't see the importance of doing the things that THEY deem is important. Is that wrong? Another talk with another colleague also made me think. I asked her what she thought of the above remark. She didn't answer me immediately but asked me instead,"I thought you didn't care about these things?" And I reflected on what she said. And I realised that there were 2 levels involved. On the rational level, I knew that being favoured by the leadership meant that you had to be good at stuff like managing big events etc...these, to me, are rubbish. I just don't think all those stuff that they think is impt, should be impt in a school's context. Shouldn't being able to teach and to handle your own class well, and with love, matter? To me, those are the things that SHOULD matter. I do not foresee myself ever changing myself to fit their mold, so I guess I'm never gg to be favoured. And therefore on a rational level, I cannot be bothered about what they think cos i'm not gg to change. But then, on an emotional level, nobody likes to not be liked or appreciated. As if it isn't enough that sometimes I feel unappreciated by my class. So in that sense, I guess it doesn't feel good to not be favoured.

(A side thought: You know, it's strange that I seem to be more appreciated by students from 2 years ago. Yesterday I went to 'babysit' a sec 3 class. After I was done, I walked out and bumped into a student I taught 2 years ago and he exclaimed,"Hey! How come you teach that class never teach my class??!" This same boy also made me feel so appreciated when several weeks ago I spoke with him and he said his English improved so much when I taught him before. Sigh)

So...all these more or less sums up why I put a line through TEACHER in my list of possible career choices I guess.

Did anyone notice the sky today??! The clouds were GORGEOUS!!! I had a whale of a time taking photo after photo everywhere I went...=)

I went late-night grocery shopping today... was quite a nice and peaceful feeling walking through the empty aisles looking at the offer items. *heh* I've always had that auntie-ness in me, but I DON'T CARE. I LIKE grocery shopping ok. Bought lotsa snacks and biscuits to tide me through the stress at school..and hunger of course. Heh.

Anyways...I came across this while shopping...

...and I remembered long long long long long time ago....the picnics we used to have at ECP, and the excellent nosh we had. And that's how I thought about you.....my dearest M....=) Let's have a picnic some time....=)

I MISS MY CG!!! All our massage sessions...heh....all the yelling that H did on the bed was amazing lah and then all the pouncing upon bruises.....Then there were the makan sessions..H's soba, salad and baked salmon (or was the salmon recipe from M?)..Ooh and all the brain-racking we had to do especially when for the longest time we had to da-pao food to MAYSPRINGS because someone was click-clacketing around...There was also E's weird word contortions that kept us in fits of laughter....H's dodo-ness and erm, gassyness and getting chased outa the room by E.....M's explosive but impressive guffawing...M's mum's delicious SOUP!! I love soup...MmmMMmmmm.....hmm...wonder what was my thing then...think I was quite normal lah...=P ...I MISS MY CG!!!

I can imagine a lot of people wanting to pounce on my bruise and rub it furiously (and gleefully)...*shudder*

Been getting food from friends lately...mm....so nice of them to share the good stuff with meeee...heeheehee..

This one comes all the way from HK!! Krispy Kreme...so pretty!! Had it for recess on Monday...
Thanks to C, I finally got to TASTE my non-flaky egg tarts!! Samore got 3 leh...ate one today...2 more to go! Non-flaky is definitely the way to go! Flaky is BAD. Bleah.

Thanks to my clumsiness...whammed my fleshy thigh right into the corner of the armrest of a pew at True Way Pres, during the Missions Conference. Was so painful I think I was stunned for a while before I collapsed backwards onto the pew. 'A' could only gape in amazement. Afterwards I had to hobble for a while and for the next couple of days, there emerged a mini mound which gave mini vibrations whenever I moved my legs. Eww..

And you know what they say...祸不单行

So you know what else I did the very next day? I was trying to pull on my trek shoes while waiting for the lift...The same hand that was pulling on the back of my shoe was also holding my keycard... My hand, together with my keycard jerked upwards as my shoe suddenly gave way and slipped onto my foot. In doing so, the corner of my keycard 'slashed' the exact spot on my bare thigh ( I was in PE attire...i.e. shorts) where my nasty bruise cum mound was. BOY DID IT HURT!!! See something that looks like a purple line? Yep, that's the one...oww...*mew*

Look what I got!!....
Cooooool....
Thanks LY! =)

He replied!! He replied!!! FINALLY....

My colleague who MIA-ed finally replied!! Thank God! But it took notes of concern from some of us at work, plus 40 notes from EVERYONE in my class to get a response outa him. Dropped by his house on Friday after a draining day at school. Wanted to leave the envelope of goodies in his mailbox but the mailbox was 'locked'...so had to go up to his house...thought maybe could slot it in under his door but there was hardly any gap between the door and the floor!! So I reluctantly left it at his door between the grille gates, wondering if it would be gone before he even got a chance to look at it. I didn't suppose he'd want people to visit so didn't want to ring the bell.

Anyways, today, I got an sms from him!! Three actually! The first was probably a mass sms to all who wrote to him. I replied without expecting anymore response from him actually. But he suddenly replied to thank me for getting my class to write. Think he was touched by what they wrote=) I asked if he would consider coming back to school for Teachers' Day Celebration, saying it would be nice to see him on my bday. But then he said no lah... =( Nevertheless, I'm happy enough he replied. Shall not be too greedy =) Now I just hope he recovers soon...

THIS is why spongebob got stuck in my Imac!!! Stoopid stoopid.... what IS that thing???

Once had a heart-to-heart talk with a good friend. She shared with me some of her fears and I totally understood. Really I did. Cos I've gone through that myself. Being with someone but always feeling bad or guilty because you feel you're not giving as much as the other party is, or that you're not giving as much as you know you can. Possibly cos deep down, you know that you probably don't love the person enough, or as much as you think you ought to. I know that feeling.

If this was a married couple we're talking about, then love wouldn't encompass just feelings, it would include a lifelong commitment to love each other in their actions, even if they didn't feel like it. Afterall, you and I both know that love isn't JUST a feeling. But then, this isn't a married couple we're talking about it. It just doesn't feel right when the reason she might carry on the relationship sounds suspiciously like pity or guilt. It isn't right either, when her decision-making process is influenced by irrational thoughts which say that it's her fault when bad things happen to the guy whenever she initiates a break. I understand, it just seems heartless to want to continue with the break when bad things happen. People might even say you're cruel. But I think it's worse to hang on for the wrong reasons. It's even more unfair to the guy. One one hand, she knows deep down that this guy takes very good care of her and will be a good husband, and that she may never find someone as caring. But on the other hand, she doesn't feel for him the way he does for her. It's not that she doesn't care about him, of course she does! Even friends who spend that much time together over a period of a few years would right? I mean, we're only human and we have feelings, particularly for someone as softhearted as her. But that's just not the same.

I'm not advocating a break. I just want her to be happy. If she finds it with this guy, I'd be happy for her. But this is not the first time she wants a break. The last time it happened but didn't happen because something unfortunate happened to him and she went back to him to take care of him. Whether out of obligation or the kindness of her heart or what, I don't know. It just doesn't sound....you know, like the real deal? I don't want the same story to repeat for her a few years down the road. So much time would have come and gone by then.

Anyway, my point is, I remember trying to tell her not to be afraid about not finding someone and about how important being at peace about her decision was. I remember being alarmed that she wanted to accept this guy because she didn't think she'd find someone else she'd like better than someone she was with before. I don't know if you understood that. Her theory was that you'd only really really really like one person in your lifetime and if that person was gone, no one else could replace him, so you might as well just settle for whoever's the next most suitable. Wah piang...I didn't know what to say. I felt trapped because I couldn't adequately express what I truly felt, in a way that she'd understand! While I understood what she was going through, her fears and all, I do not share her fear right now because I'm confident that God has His plans for me and that everything that's going on right now is going according to His plans. Even if I don't know what those plans are. I wanted so much to share with her the assurance that I have in Christ. That what is meant to be, will be, and that there's no need to hang on, just in case. I firmly believe so. Who am I? Dare I think that what I do will actually mess up His plans?? No. Even if I were to make a wrong decision or make a wrong move, His plans will still be in motion.

Right now, I'm enjoying the freedom that being single brings. I'm not worrying about not finding someone because I believe that God has a purpose for me being where I am now. I'm finding fulfilment in spending time with people, whether it's people in church or at work or elsewhere. I want to be able to invest in lives, the way Christ did in His 3 years of ministry. I want my life, my time right now, to count for something. He will bring someone just right for me (and He knows exactly what sort of person that would be because He knows exactly what sort of person I am, simply because He made me) at just the right time. And if He doesn't, I know that it's not meant to be. He will give me the grace to accept what He has planned in time. He always does.

How do I explain why I no longer share her fears? How do I convey to her my strong feelings of trust in my Lord and Saviour, my trust in His plans and timing? I'm not sure how to make her understand. I wrote her a card and I struggled with whether to write her a verse or not. Would she understand? Would she know what it is? Would she think I'm being preachy and irritating in her time of need? Then I decided, that God's Word speaks for itself. His Holy Spirit would do the speaking and convicting. Afterall, she should know by now, that I'm not her friend only because I want to preach at her, we've shared a lot more than that. I think she would understand that I sincerely do care for her and love her as a friend. There was nothing I needed to do, except to trust that God's Word has the power of life. And so I wrote Philippians 4:6-7 in the hope that she might find peace in the Lord if only she asks Him, in her own way.

And the, it dawned upon me, the privilege we have in being God's children. There are so many things we take for granted. I mean, I look at my life and I'm amazed at how I've 'recovered' from the 'falls' I've had over the years. While my life has been relatively smooth-sailing, I think I've also had my fair share of trials and heartbreaks. Those weren't easy times for me, and there were many times I thought I'd never get over the pain. Nights I'd cry myself to sleep and feel like there's no tomorrow...days I'd constantly feel a physical pain in my heart and a constant need to vomit because I felt sick to the core and just unwell all over... weeks where I never felt the need to eat and when I did eat, everything tasted the same - dry and unappetising...I remember hating the nights because I had trouble sleeping, and hating being alone because it meant memories would keep flooding into my head and threatening to drown me. I remember trying to work myself hard so that I'd feel tired and perhaps be able to get some sleep in the night. I remember trying so hard to avoid certain places and things and people, just so I wouldn't be reminded of times that would make me upset. Yep, that was how bad it was for me before during certain milestones of my life. But then, I also remember crying out to the Lord, each and every night. I remember Him speaking to me through His Word, through my prayers and through the encouragement and company of good friends He brought to me in my time of trial. And each time, slowly but surely, He healed my wounds and gave me joy once again. This, is part of our legacy as God's children. He gives us the strength and grace to recover and then to move on, something many others, who do not have Christ, are unable to experience. There are so many instances of people who never quite recover and carry the 'scars' they sustain for life. Some become bitter, and more and more so as life deals them more blows. Others become cynical and suspicious of every good thing that life hands them on a platter. I'm not perfect, far from it, and things in life do influence me to a certain extent. Perhaps I do still 'sustain injury' and carry some 'scars', but I definitely have an advantage with Christ on my side =)

How you know your suspicions of old-age are spot-on....


When in your spare moments, you're browsing in a music store, looking at everything, but end up buying these...



Suddenly...I feel a panic attack coming...and THEN, indignation....
SO WHAT!! I HAPPEN to like them ok!! The first one's soothing in an old school way...(reminds me of my piano-playing days...) and the second one has got GREAT vocals and FEEL....i'm gg to sing that at ktv. KTV CRAVINGS!!! AARRRRGH....

Today, I found myself talking to myself a lot...parked my car at the free parking lot just next to JP and went to get my late dinner. The carpark was full when I went for dinner, but when I got back to it, my car was sitting in the middle of the entire carpark like a lone island!! All the remaining cars just happened to be along the perimeter of the carpark. Geez...that was a really weird sight. And then, walking to the middle of the parking area, I started talking to myself...about my car and about myself. Hmmm...I'm getting cranky. I can't remember exactly what I said, but I do remember questioning myself sometime later....*heh*

SO! Why did Jasmine talk to herself??

a) Because it's normal for everyone at some point of time.
b) Because she hasn't spoken much in the latter half of the day and needs to let it out.
c) Because she's always had a screw loose.
d) Because she loves the sound of her own voice.
e) Because that's how she figures things out...talking things out (to herself).
f) Because that's how she amuses herself.

Ok, NOW I am amused at myself...*hahaaahaaaha*

(Weirdo...sometimes she thinks she's so farnee...duH! oO)

These ones GOOD!







These ones BAD!!







Can see the difference or not??!

Flaky pastry is bad bad bad...tastes yucky, is messy, and fattening...
Portugeuse egg tarts also use more egg yolk (more cholesterol) and is so rich you'll feel 'jelak' if you ate too many...(in fact any more than one is enough to make me feel sick)


I WANT MY EGG TART!!! hmm....donut...

Looks like I'm just not meant to have my tart and eat it too...

Twice I went to this place in search of my non-flaky-pastry egg tart. Twice I returned home without it...(but with other 收获 lah...heh). So sad.

But then, last Saturday, I went bedok with G and saw the kind of egg tart I like! So I bought one and happily made my way home with it and 2 other cheesecake tarts for my family. Wanted to eat on Sunday after I got home from church. Sunday morning as I was leaving for church, I told my brother that he could eat the CHEESECAKE TARTS if he was hungry. He just grunted. And then I rushed off. You can guess what happened.

Planned to eat my egg tart in front of the telly while watching my 花样少年少女 vcd...went to the fridge and saw 2 lonely cheesecake tarts staring at me woefully, having lost their prized pal evidently. You can only imagine my consternation. Being the good sister I am, I said absolutely nothing to my blissfully oblivious brother. Now, I can only stare regretfully at the empty silver foil which once enthroned my egg tart, but presently sits (almost) forgotten and incomplete in my dustbin, no longer whole.

Wonder if it tasted good at all...=(

Last week, I happened to visit this in one particular shopping mall...


And then, I couldn't help but notice the bright red sign next to it... let me enlarge it for you...

Don't get me wrong, I'm in NO WAY making fun of the handicapped, nothing like that at all. It's just that when I saw the above, I couldn't help but be reminded of the phrase "push the panic button". And suddenly this just kinda...brought a whole new perspective to the common-used phrase? I wonder which came first. Was this always around for the handicapped, and hence the phrase? Or did someone building such conveniences for our handicapped friends decide to just adopt the phrase in his/her design, hence giving the phrase a whole new dimension? Hmmm...

Isn't it nice? There were so many on the pathway... wanted to pick them all up =) Just find it so cool that nature would produce such perfect heart-shaped leaves. I went home with this leaf in my hand, and a smile on my face, in spite of an 'interrupted' jog. Lovely!

幸福是停止追逐你所认定能带给你幸福的人或物。
Does it make sense?

幸福是种状态， 不单是个短暂的感觉。
它不是喜悦，而是满足。

幸福是个过程，也是过程的成果。
它是学会知足， 而不是拼命的追逐。

幸福是不受情况所控制，更不受任何人主宰。
它不受周围的影响，也经得起时间的考验。

真实的幸福是永久的，也唯有上帝能赐。

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
你呢？你对幸福的定义又是什么？

One of my 'spoils' for the day last Saturday was chancing upon a photography exhibition at AMK central. The exhibits probably weren't world-class or taken by those professionals (but then I wouldn't bet on that, so don't quote me), since viewing the exhibition was entirely free, and taking photographs of the photographs wasn't a crime! It was like, free-for-all man! Everyone's handphones came out! I felt quite guilty. But then I looked all around for any signs which might say that photographing the exhibits is a crime or something, but there wasn't any in sight! And all the aunties and uncles milling about were just blatantly and shamelessly taking EVERY photo! Below each exhibit was a famous saying taken from some religious text. It could be Hindu or Muslim or Buddhist or Christian or...you get my drift? But then it wasn't always related to the photograph above, so I wasn't quite sure what THAT was all about. In any case, I was particularly tickled by an old grandmother, who meticulously went from exhibit to exhibit, furiously scribbling down every single 'wise saying' under each exhibit on her little notebook. heh. So, you know what they say right? If you can't beat them, JOIN them.... *heeheeheee*

And then these....I really had a good time staring at...found them so...fascinating....

I usually like scenery shots, either of the sky or of water. But for some reason unknown to me, I was the most fascinated with this next shot...

Wish I was there...in that picture...looking up at those trees.

It was a good outing for me that day =)

I can't, for the life of me, remember what the other two things are that I wanted to post about last Saturday!! Sigh. Only remember one of them. Anyway...I'll just give it my best shot. Not sure if these were what I had in mind initially, but...whatever lah... =P



2) I had a good time after the visit to the hair salon. Nice alone time with my sight and my thoughts. Wandered about AMK hub trying to take in all the sights and sounds. It's been a long time since I had contact with this facet of Singapore. For a long while, consumerism for me has been somewhat limited to the likes of Orchard Road and the heartland arms of Capitaland. (who is, incidentally, rapidly expanding its area of influence and upgrading its caverns of wealth at an alarming rate) Sure, AMK hub is hardly what one would call "back-to-the-basics", but there were many things which reminded me of my childhood and what I grew up with. And I realised how much I miss all that, and how much of a pity it is that children of this generation would never get to know or understand what things were like in the past. Little, apparently insignificant things, which would hardly make a difference in any tangible way. But that one would probably sorely miss if it was indeed present in one's life at some point of time. Strangely, it actually felt good buying sotong balls and fishcake from a stall that was NOT Old Chang Kee. Even though they tasted really weird. (And you would think that it is almost impossible to go wrong with basic stuff like that. I mean, isn't fishcake manufactured by some factory producing such stuff in masses???) I also had a strawberry shake, whose milk component quite obviously tasted like condensed milk. It was really weird, but ticklishly so. I must have been in a really placid mood that day, because I honestly found all these funny and refreshing. I even finished the condensedmilkshake!



And so, while I continued with my wandering, holding my weird-tasting food and drink, I came across an interesting sight...

Think it was linedance they were doing. But I wasn't sure if they were promoting some event or whether it was a regular programme they had for interested participants. I found the whole thing really cool. There were SOoooo many aunties, and many of them looked like they were really enjoying all the 'cha cha-ing', swaying hips and all. It was quite a sight. Think I looked odd tho, trying to take these pictures surreptitiously. I wondered if I would be this active when and if I reached that age, and whether I'd be oblivious to all the people milling about. I wondered also, what thoughts were going through the heads of the lady participants. What drove them to participate in the first place. Was it just for fun and exercise?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*yawn*...ok, gotta stop now. Sleep beckons... the last instalment tomorrow perhaps...=)